An Afternoon With Temple Grandin

Two and half years ago, I was in a very dark, sad place.  Abigail had just been diagnosed with autism.  I felt such anger, blame, and guilt towards myself.  I wondered what I had done to make her this way. 
"When was the day that I caused her to have this?"  I wondered how I was going to be able to accept the diagnosis, stop blaming myself, and start helping her learn to live with her disability.  When I did not think I could do this, this whole thing of being able to raise a child with autism, Marilena walked into my life.  Marilena was Abigail's speech therapist.  One day, when I was really struggling to accept the autism, she gave me a hug and asked me what she could do to help.  I broke down this wall I had been covering myself in.  In public, prior to this moment, I did not show emotion.  I pretended everything was fine, even though my life felt like it had crumbled before my eyes.  I told Marilena on that day that I knew Abigail had autism but I did not know how I would be able to handle all that goes with the diagnosis.  "Would she ever talk?"  "Would she grow up to be a functioning adult?"  "Would I be able to control her as she got older?"  "How would I get through to her to make a better life for her?"  Marilena suggested I read books by Temple Grandin. 

Temple Grandin is an author of many books on autism and animal welfare.  She lectures to groups across the country on these topics.  She went to college and has a PhD.  She also has autism. 

Temple Grandin's books have changed my life.  Her books have given me hope when I felt like there was none.  Her books have given me insight into Abigail's world when I thought I could not get into her world. 
Her books have made me a better parent and advocate for Abigail. 

A few days ago, I was able to see Dr. Grandin speak.  It has been a dream of mine to do so since I read the first page of the first book of Temple Grandins.  I was in awe of seeing her in real life.  I admire this woman so much and she could never possibly know how much of an impact she has had on my life. 

Thank you Marilena for the recommendation and that hug that opened my world so many years ago.  Thank you Temple Grandin for everything you do and the things you do that you are not even aware of.  My life is so much better because of these two extraordinary women.

www.templegrandin.com

A little Autism In All of Us

The other day I was thinking about Abigail's "issues".  She has a lot of sensory issues.  She does not like the feel of a toothbrush in her mouth.  She does not like her head massaged while getting her hair washed.  She hates to wear turtlenecks.  She only likes cotton material in her clothes.  She does not enjoy playing in sand or playdough or playing with food. 

Then I thought about myself and others I know that have sensory issues too.  My middle child does not like to wear socks.  She hates the feel of socks on her feet.  I don't wear turtlenecks and only wear the softest feeling clothes.  I don't like the way eggs feel as they go down your throat.  I don't really enjoy the feel of dirt on my hands.  Others do not like the bright sunlight or windy days.  Some do not like smells in lotions or perfumes. 

I learned to sit in the W position, so did my curly.  This is a characteristic of kids with autism.  I know many people and small children who sit this way.  My curly does not like crowded malls or people who get right in her face.  I must agree with Curly's feelings on that one.  I understand a lot of Curly's aversions to daily life.

I think everyone has sensory issues and may even have a little bit of autism deep down inside.  The only difference is that we "typical" people can handle these aversions and it does not affect our daily life.  Curly and Curly's people can not deal with the senses.  They have to be taught how to let these aversions not affect their daily lives.  This is a very hard thing for these kids to do. 

Take a little time to think about your "issues".  You'd be amazed how many sensory issues you have that you don't think about.

Like a G6

There was a day when Laurie Berkner, The Fresh Beat Band, and the Dora themesong were all Abigail needed.  In the last two months, her musical likes have changed so much.  Don't worry, Laurie Berkner, you still have a place in Abigail's heart but she also likes this crazy song, "Like A G6".  Abigail is 4 and 1/2 and gets excited every time this song comes on the radio.  The other day, we were driving back home from school when this song came on.  I looked back to see my baby jamming out in the backseat.  She was bopping her head to the beat and making her little noises to the rythym  of the song.  She was rocking back and forth so much that a cop started to follow us home and even went around us on her side of the car, I assume to make sure she was buckled in.  The smile was amazing on that cop's face and on our little girls.  At first, I thought how could she like this song.  A song about drinking and living it up, riding on private jets and so forth.  But all it took was that smile on her face and the genuine happiness I saw in her eyes to turn me around. 

I thought to myself, "Who cares what the song is about".  If it makes Abigail smile and makes her happy, then that's all that matters.  I find this statement very true with life with curly.  Of course, we have rules and things she is not allowed to do but when Curly is happy, everyone else in the house is happy.

P.S.  I have posted a video of the song in hopes it makes you as happy as it makes our Curly.

Like A G6